AN OPEN LETTER TO RABBI Y.Y. SCHOCHET OF MILL HILL SYNAGOGUE LONDON

 

Dear Rabbi Schochet,

I am writing to you after seeing your post on Facebook about the selfless actions of Rabbi Wilhelm of Zhitomir, Ukraine. He is evidently a man truly to be honoured and worthy of public acknowledgement.

Then I saw your closing words: The indomitable spirit of Chabad, and my stomach turned. Chabad is not what it one was under the wise guidance of The Rebbe. Chabad seems to have lost its way, caught up in the fact that local politics are intrinsically linked to the financial wellbeing of the Chabad Shuliach’s own family as well as the programs he wishes to implement.

I have been campaigning on behalf of Beth Alexander, formerly of Manchester, then as a young bride, of Vienna, Austria, and now living in London, where she practices as a lawyer. You may have heard about Beth and her twin sons, Benji and Sammy Schlesinger. We started a Facebook group (Reuniting Beth With Her Boys) which has more than 6,000 members, in an effort to mobilize the power of community to right a tragic wrong and travesty of Jewish values.

In case you are not up to speed on this, 10 years ago, Beth’s two year old babies were taken from her home. The Police who accompanied the social workers were perplexed as why two happy toddlers and their loving mother should be brutally separated in this way. The Austrian, non-Jewish social workers tried to help Beth, not seeing any reason for her to lose her children.

The immediate, shocking change of custody followed a court case where the judge ruled Beth was incapable of looking after the day-to-day needs of her boys. This was based on evidence brought by the ex-husband, Dr Michael Schlesinger, a man with a history of violent domestic abuse who previously had a restraining order against him. Astonishingly, the story, which I have read on the court documents, was this: After the boys’ brits Beth, a young and first-time mother, was beside herself with worry when the anaesthetic wore off and both babies woke up in agony. The father, a medical doctor, had gone to a barmitzvah party. In desperation, Beth called him and he tried to instruct her by phone how to medicate the babies with suppositories – not something widely used in the UK. When she couldn’t manage, he became angry. This was the gist of the evidence, that two years prior, a young mother was distressed by her babies’ pain and disturbed her husband while he was enjoying a party.

There was also a false psychiatric report stating that Beth had suffered from post-natal depression. She hadn’t, it was anyway two years previous to the case, subsequent [and impartial] psychiatric reports showed that her mental health was perfectly ok, and post-natal depression is no reason to have your children taken from you two years later! You would have to be an axe wielding murderer to be punished as Beth was. Her crime? She married a violent, abusive, and subsequently vindictive man, whose need for revenge outweighs any concerns for his sons’ welfare.

I don’t know why a whole community rallied around Michael Schlesinger and helped him spread rumours about Beth’s mental health. He is not a rich man. However, I suspect he knows too much about the dodgy financial goings-on in that community (you can see the video about it on the “Help Beth” You Tube channel) and they could not risk such a loose cannon. (There is also the involvement of a Jewish judge, a friend of Schlesinger, who has been influential in this case.) A look at the some of the other videos will instantly show you that Beth was and is a loving and responsible mother.

This is a long introduction to get to my point about Chabad. As you will see from my letter (attached), Rabbi Jacob Biderman abandoned all moral decency in his bid to curry favour within the community. He ignored the confusion, depression and suffering of two little boys in his care by blocking Beth from all contact with her children in his school. He lied that Schlesinger’s lawyers had written to him instructing him to do this but they denied this under oath and no letter could ever be produced. Even as little Benji was ramming himself into a brick wall to numb his pain, as reported by an independent social worker, Biderman told the court that the boys were thriving with their father.

For ten years, despite pleading letters from Beth (which Biderman dutifully forwarded to Schlesinger’s lawyers), she has been barred from attending her children’s birthday parties and other celebrations in school, and has been denied all information about their welfare and progress.

Many of us have written to our local Chabad Rabbis. The responses have been shocking, as you can see from my letter to Chabad. Since then, other Rabbis have replied that it’s all lies – having taken about half an hour to “thoroughly research the case.” I have been contacted by a former worker at Chabad who told me that the conflict of interests between what is right and the need for the Chabad Shuliach to cover his expenses, including his own mortgage, has led to many unsavoury situations around the globe.

However, we are not talking about an extra aliya in shul or a front seat, or other honours that a Rabbi could legitimately and justifiably bestow in return for financial contributions. We are talking about the absolute cruelty of depriving two young boys of all contact with their mother for 10 years! Chief Rabbi Mirvis flew to Vienna to talk to Biderman and got some assurances which Biderman then reneged upon. Other Rabbis have also tried to reason with him to no avail.

The situation now is that all appeals to the Austrian courts have been denied – the same judge has been presiding over this case for 10 years so she’s not going to re-examine her own performance – and all contact between Beth and her boys has been stopped. They say it is at the boys’ request but what 12-year-olds want nothing to do with a mother who has only ever loved them unless they are influenced or intimidated into this position? Schlesinger continues to taunt Beth with hateful text messages telling her how much the boys hate her, how they are ashamed of her, and that this is all her own fault.

There is little we can do against the corruption of the Austrian Family Courts, although we have not given up trying, but we all know there are ways that Jewish leadership can apply pressure where there is outrageous chillul Hashem. And yet, Chabad do not want to know. They will not rock the boat for the sake of two innocent boys. Chabad have lost their way. Stories of our great Rabbis of yesteryear are not all about the grand gestures of public heroism. Rather it is the humble and private mitzvot that give relief to a suffering soul with no expectation of reward, that we are taught to revere. Where is Chabad when they are called upon to challenge corruption within their gates? Why is the destruction of one Jewish family unimportant among the mitsvot and middot Chabad claim to uphold?

I would really like to hear your thoughts on this subject. In the interests of disclosure, I will be sharing this letter openly as we have learned that discreet enquiries and secrets do nothing to help. I hope you will reply, but you should know that your reply will also be shared.

Yours respectfully,
Rachel Selby, Jerusalem

Rabbi Schochet's response

Dear Rachel,

Thank you for your letter. I had been in touch with Beth a few weeks back in which she wrote back acknowledging my help as well as previous help in the past as well.

Wishing you along with all others involved every success in this endeavour in the hope that indeed a mother can be rightfully reunited with her children.