o.deutsch@ikg-wien.at
office@ikg-wien.at
Dear Mr Deutsch,
My name is Esther Seymour. I’m a Jewish mother, a child and parent trauma therapist and, I’m sure like you, I have a good moral compass.
My work with the mind has given me a deep understanding of how humans work and why we behave in the ways we behave. Repetition of experience is the biggest factor in how we live our lives, which is why people of all faiths, when learning so young, stick to their faith throughout their lives.
It’s also the reason why we have fears (past experience), good or not so good behaviours, addictions or why we laugh at silly things (our childhood experience still plays out in adulthood) and how we believe we should treat our fellow humans.
I have been following the story about Beth Alexander, her children and their father on and off for far too many years. And I can hand on heart say that not allowing a mother to see her children is having a huge impact on both her children and Beth and whether or not it is showing now, it will show in the future. It will dictate how they treat their wives, it will dictate how they treat their children. They can only know what they know.
I wonder what happened in the lives of the people who are allowing this to happen for them to believe that this is ok? That this is “normal”. Who has experienced something g similar for this to not seem irrational? There’s no blame here, they’re playing out experiential repetition - but it’s evident that there’s lots of healing to be done for all parties involved to ensure that the children don’t repeat these behaviours when they’re older.
I’m sure everyone feels they have their reasons, and their reason may feel really valid to them because they’re being led by all that they know but actually, what if we looked outside all we know and look at the family models all across the world.
Mothers and fathers who have addictions, have abused their children, live in squalor, live in danger all still have the option to be rehabilitated as the main objection is always to keep children with their parents.
Beth has done none of these. She doesn’t need rehabilitation, she has committed no crime. Her children are safe with her, her children are loved by her, she has continually fought for them with a broken heart and will continue to do so for as long as it takes.
Can you, had on heart, with G-d as your witness, say that these children - in fact - any children except those with parents who are beyond help - should not be seeing their mother regularly? The woman who carried these children in her own body? Who loved and nurtured them into the world?
I do not believe for one second that G-d condones this… he created life with duality. Masculine and feminine. Positive and negative. Light and dark.
All children need to experience both parents, whether they are together or not.
This needs to be readdressed and I’m sure you’ll agree, an independent investigation, outside of the same people who have already been involved (to prevent experiential bias) needs to be conducted.
Beth needs to be reunited with her children and them with her.
I’m writing this letter to you to facilitate the putting of all the wrongs back to right. For restoring balance in the parental role in this families life.
If all fathers were able to do this, if this is the tone that is set, it won’t be too many generations before there are no mothers left to continue our great religion. If these children believe this is normal, just as their father does, what will stop them from doing this to their own? And their own and their own… Is this the beginning of the end? It doesn’t need to be. The generational trauma can be healed and duality restored.
Please consider putting pressure on your community to restore what was intended by G-d.
Yours, in trust,
Esther Seymour
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